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Ferox's Universal Monster Review


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Ferox's Universal Monster Review

Spoilers all around. If you don't like spoilers, stay away.

Opening scaremonies...well I missed the moment where they let loose the dogs of war since the people working scanners seemed to be entirely incompetent that particular day. I did get the pleasure of running through the purgers a few minutes after the opening bell so to speak. I'll get to my review of the scarezone later on.

So my wife and I ran into the lower lot (we got a lot of amazing cardio throughout the night) to catch Insidious. Tucker and Spec were there, I asked them if they had seen any Unicorns. They said they had and gave us both cards.

Facade: Well, it's a house. It looks like a house. The clips explaining how it's not the house that's haunted but the child (which I don't think was present in the maze?) did help set the mood. B-.

Threshold Room: First room lacked any scare, but set the mood well with more samples from the movie. C+.

Set design: Nice detail for the most part, but as others have said The Further really needed some fog. The suburban homes felt like suburban homes. I caught a good amount of detail on the second run, which is a plus for me. B+

Cast design and performance: Amazing. The energy that the people who played the Red Faced Demon brought was top notch. Everyone looked like they did in the movie. The La Llorona inspired lady (I haven't seen part two) was a dead ringer. Further ghosts crept me out something fierce. A.

Final thoughts: Beautifully done. A touch of overuse with the Red Faced Demon, but the actors were on fire so that's alright. The house overall gets a B.

I checked the times to see that Evil Dead and the Backlot mazes still had a 10 minute wait, so we scurried over to Evil Dead.

Facade: Yup. Trees. The Necronomicon recording from the first movie did make me happy and when you got to the cabin, it looked great. C+ though.

Threshold Room: And what a room it was. The Mia that pops out of the fog got me hard each time. I think the mannequin Mia looked pretty good. That being said, I thought the Mia that popped out during the flooded basement scene was cheesy and I won't defend it. That was a bad call. But that's later in the maze, this threshold gets a B.

Set design: Very impressive. It really felt like a cabin. I caught a lot of little nuances the second and third time around like the cards on the table, VHS tapes on a rack, stuff like that. The scent cannons were releasing just the right amount of “rot” to make it feel right. The raining blood scene was pulled off pretty well, especially for how daunting that task is. I hope they get the special effects worked out, I might do a follow up review when I go on the 5th. One little touch that I liked was the faint lullaby played in the background in one scene. Creepy. B+.

Cast design and performance: Again, amazing. The makeup effects on the living actors was top notch. I loved going through multiple times to appreciate the detail that I could only see for a few seconds. Great scare cycle work and teamwork with a few scenes. A+.

Final thoughts: It's odd to me to see people refer to this as a maze they have wanted to see for years. This isn't the Evil Dead you wanted to see in 2010. Anyway...while Orlando's version does have a lot of advantages over the Hollywood version (their better venue helps) I think that our tree rape version was better. Even with a live actor, look at what Orlando did. A really important part of that scene to me was being lifted off the ground to emphasize hopelessness and restraint. Orlando had a woman with branches on her arms kinda resisting. The vomit scene had two live actors and from what I can see with the posted videos, an actor pretending to vomit with nothing coming out. The climax with the chainsaw to the head wasn't even attempted in Orlando. But, their idea of ending it with the dual chainsaw screaming demon scare was maybe a better chase out. I liked this maze. A-.

After leaving Evil Dead we decided it was time to head over to the Universal backlot. The tour guide for the first two times we went to the backlot sounded like he got lost on his way to Disney's haunted mansion. Incredibly cheesy. Anyway, once off the tram we were greeted right away by some Walkers.

Dead on Arrival.

Easily, the best scarezone of the night, I liked the other ones, I really did. But this was amazing. The experience was like a mini terror tram. Right away you are greeted by a horde of walkers. After running the gauntlet of walkers in thick fog (seriously amazing work from everyone in there) there's a less foggy but amazingly themed scarezone. Any reservations I may have had about a Walking Dead scarezone maze AND terror tram were immediately put to rest with this. I went through this three times and each time was a total blast. A+.

So after that...the obvious answer was No Safe Haven.

Facade: We all saw the prison as it was being built, and having multiple walkers in the area made me wonder if you can even count it as a facade or part of the maze. But for the sake of this review, I'm counting the entire fenced area as the facade. Best facade of the year, hands down. A+

Threshold room: If you count the opening turn and arc before cellblock c, then it does a very good role in preparing you for how tight everything is going to get soon. No really hard scares, but it unnerves you a bit. If you include cellblock c as a whole as the threshold...very impressive. Multiple scares in one room. I liked the survivor that committed suicide. Nothing communicates a sense of “no safe haven” like suicide. A+

Set design: When you first enter Cellblock C you immediately realize how detailed it is. The second time I went through the crowd was moving slower than the line we just got out of, so these little touches got picked up. Hair on the staircase was a favorite of mine. I liked that even though the maze's size allowed for huge scenes, they included a lot of very claustrophobic moments. There was a really wide variety of rooms which made the maze feel so much more dynamic. I did think that the charging horde of animatronic walkers was cheesy though, it would have been better if there was nothing in that corner. I see the empty phone call room as a reference to nobody being there (get it?) so I actually liked it. A.

Cast design and performance: Again, bravo to the cast. Great timing with the scares and good intensity that made sense for being walkers. The makeup was great, but since that was the one thing I can really say I saw last year and this year again it didn't stand out. Aside from the pet walkers, who were convincingly armless. A.

Final thoughts: AMC killed any chance of American Horror Story coming to HHN. We know that it was going to happen in Orlando and that it probably would have come to Hollywood, but AMC nixed that. As a hardcore AHS fan, this maze made me not so depressed about that. It really was a wonderful maze, and easily the best of the year. A.

So after we left No Save Haven, the logical next step was Black Sabbath.

Facade: Moreso than The Walking Dead, it is hard to say where the facade is. There's a tiny archway that takes you into the maze, and then a lush sickly pink and purple gothic church garden with a facade that reaches the ceiling. The “figure in black” was cool to see but not an effective scare either time I saw it. Despite the scare being kinda weak (I generally don't get scared by stilt walkers...not sure why) having the starting point of Black Sabbath the band be the start of Black Sabbath the maze was awesome.

Threshold room: Two “living statue” scares. It was interesting to see a statue that looked to be only the chest do the scare, but at the same time it limited what they could do. If you don't count the small area as a full room, the NIB room was much better. Satan getting down to my favorite NIB song when he sacrifices his bride on the altar was quite a sight. Having three living statue scares back to back was a bit of a “oh come on” moment. Even if that particular living statue scare was well placed and the statue looked amazing. Better than any living statue I've seen. B

Set design: The 3D was amazing. Especially in the Sabbath Blood Sabbath room. But, it sacrificed a lot of detail that I think could have added more to the maze. I could not believe that they reused freaking SAW traps. Something that specific should never be reused. I can see getting a lot of mileage from the hanging pigs since they can be justified in various situations, but those props were just uncalled for. I did like the trenches setup in the War Pigs room though, it made the scares hard to predict. Children of a Grave room was way too wide to really get a good scare out of it. I really liked what they did with the Paranoid room though. I was wondering how they were going to use that song in a maze, but they did it. I also really liked the Geiger counter sounds in the radiation scenes. I think there's a arching storyline here, but I'm not entirely sure. B.

Character design/performance: The characters all looked great in 3D. The design for the Children of the Grave reminded me of EC horror comics, which I liked. The plague doctors and war pig nurses stood out to me as well. The cast all did a good job with their respective roles. A+.

Final thoughts: It was much better and had harder scares than Goes To Hell. Personally, I think the audio was at a good volume to allow for the trigger sounds to do their job.

On the way back to the upper lot we did see the Scarecrowz. If this had gotten a better venue with some props and theme, it could have been great. However, the lower lot got shafted again. The design of the scarecrowz was pretty good, if not a bit basic/cliche. They served a certain purpose of setting a mood, but as far are scares they were limited by their location and lack of numbers. C-.

El Cucuy: The Boogeyman

Facade: I liked that it was so close to Mel's. It was supposed to be in an modern urban area, and Mel's fits that. It was a bit unassuming, but it sold the theater idea well enough that I heard people question if El Cucuy was a new show or a maze. Then again, I heard people wonder if Black Sabbath was going to be a ride or a maze. The opening narration from Danny Trejo was a nice touch. Personally I would have gone with El Cucuy standing outside the facade instead of popping out once in a while.

Threshhold: The two aisles of people that jump out thing was a bit too much like La Llorona's opening scene. Especially since it's obviously going to be compared to La Llorona, especially by people with racist motives for hating the maze. However, the setup is effective and the scene is interesting.

Set design: I'll have to go back since there's a new scare in that much maligned empty hallway, so for the time being I'll ignore that glaring flaw.

The birthday massacre and trophy room were two of my favorite rooms this year. The victim with his innards replaced by pumpkin seeds is was one of the most interesting sights this year. Disembowelment/table scares aren't new, but the bizarre ritual of pumpkin seeds being shoved into a human for a feast is something else. So many of the scenes seemed sinister...or dare I say it...insidious. More insidious than Insidious. A-.

Cast design and performance: El Cucuy looked pretty awesome. However, there are natural limits to having one central character design. The idea of El Cucuy transforming into something you trust and love is dark on a really deep level. A few of the scares had weird timing, which I didn't really experience elsewhere. B+

Final thoughts: Walking through the maze, the person in front of me kept on screaming that “THIS IS (censored) UP!” over and over. And he was right. This maze carried on the tradition La Llorona set by having an interesting maze that crossed a few lines. I know a few whiny white people are upset that a haunt in LA is making amazing mazes that are based on Hispanic folklore instead of traditional European folklore, but come on. This is a great maze, if the fact that some Hispanic people grew up with this upsets you for some reason you're probably just racist.

Terror Tram

Pretty much the same as last year, but with some improvements. Last year it was zombies with walker makeup in the backlot, this year they took the effort to make the backlot look more like Woodbury. It didn't exactly immerse me, but it was nice to see the walker pit, walker traps, school bus, etc. Not only did it justify using the same property again, but it helped the tram become more dynamic. Great job from the scareactors, which makes me give this an A-.

Monster Remix

Look, I went into this wanting it to be alright. I don't think that having dubstep near the classic monsters sullies their otherwise perfect name, as the monsters have been campy Halloween goofiness (which is nice) for the better part of a century. That being said, this was actively worse than last year. All of the additions were cheesy as Hell and I actually cringed a few times. Not out of fear, but of how awful the entire experience was. I would skip this one even without any line. I would rather spend eight to ten minutes in the nearby Purge scarezone than walk through this. I'm not going into any more detail, but I'll just give this a D.

Speaking of The Purge, let's talk about it.

Some people took issue with how the characters and weapons are too normal looking. Personally, I like that. All of the other attractions had a supernatural or mythological element as the central focus. In previous HHN years, there had been one attraction that could happen in the world as we know it today. 2012 had the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, 2011 had HOTC and Hostel, 2010 had Saw, 2009 also had Saw, My Bloody Valentine, and Halloween (depending on if you count the early Halloween movies as supernatural or if the occult storylines in the sequels retroactively make Myers an occult character in the original movies), 2007 had the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and 2006 had The Director. This year everything has a ghost, demon, zombie, or monster in it. The Purge gave a sense of gritty realism to the event. One touch that I really liked was how one of the victims was hanged by an extension cord. It gave the entire zone a feeling of improvised urban chaos. A.

Curse of Chucky: A while ago I was hoping to see a human voodoo doll someday, and I got my wish. Chucky's Untitled Insult Show was a letdown though. Mostly boring sexist jokes (from other videos I've seen, he really likes “make me a sandwich”) and other stuff with no real finesse or bite to it. I mean I know that Chucky is a bit of a woman hater at times, but if all you can muster up is “bring me a sandwich” then you need to work on your insult game. Maybe he'll work that out.

I did like that the scarezone told the story of Chucky hijacking some Good Guy cars and turning the drivers into human toys. It helped prevent “Here's some scary stuff” syndrome. B.

French Klownz: This did however, suffer from “Here's some scary stuff” syndrome. However, what was there was pretty creepy. Clowns are about as cliché as you can get, but adding the french element to them really did make a difference. Not too much to say, but I did really enjoy it. B+


I didn't watch Bill and Ted because pop culture references and music do not interest me, so I'm the wrong guy to review it.

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Great review. Sounds like you enjoyed pretty much everything!... aside from UMR. How would ya rank this year with others? Also, I think you forgot to grade Cucuy (nevermind, just saw it was an A-). Good point on the Purge though. I never thought of it as "filling that void" but I still think the central scarezone should be a bit scarier - but then again, I wouldn't place it anywhere else in the park as a zone.

Edited by DTH316
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How would ya rank this year with others?

Well I moved to socal recently so I can only really compare it to 2012, but I would say that it's a little better than 2012 overall.

Edited by ferox
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Your hyper-critical reviews and eye for detail have led me away from visiting Knott's this year. I will only focus on Universal as my main haunt this coming week. Good job. Glad you had a chance to enjoy it with your spouse....this will be our fifth year attending and possibly our last (or might skip a year).

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I personally loved Knott's this year, but others on here don't really seem to like it. If you're on the fence about going, I would encourage you to check it out. Everyone is going to have a different opinion. For example, Everyone seems to like HHN this year while I seem to not enjoy it as much as I used to. Like Ferox said, factor in the reviews as something to take into consideration, but check it out and I think you may be pleasantly surprised.

Just be sure to get there before they open and hit Mirror Mirror first thing.

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If you want to see Knotts, don't let my negative review alone kill your chances. Factor it in maybe, but don't let it be a deciding factor.

Every year, I tentatively plan to visit KSF but there are numerous reports from this site and other sources that I base my decision on. My time is limited up in the LA area, and KSF seems to be on par with some local haunts in AZ, mostly geared towards the Jr. High crowd. Not a big fan of regular Knott's, and I no longer do the thrill ride thing. It becomes an easy decision.

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I loved the thrill rides I went on (ghost rider, sierra sidewinder, xcelerator, silver bullet) but if that isn't your thing then there's no point. If you're into them, walking onto (at least when I went, times will logically change as the month progresses on) some excellent coasters at night was the high point of the evening.

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I personally loved Knott's this year, but others on here don't really seem to like it. If you're on the fence about going, I would encourage you to check it out. Everyone is going to have a different opinion. For example, Everyone seems to like HHN this year while I seem to not enjoy it as much as I used to. Like Ferox said, factor in the reviews as something to take into consideration, but check it out and I think you may be pleasantly surprised.

Just be sure to get there before they open and hit Mirror Mirror first thing.

Great points, Freak! I did get excited after I viewed your two-part "infomercial" (hee hee) but I went with my gut feeling and probably would have ended up not enjoying the event.

I am still jealous of your bi-coastal jaunt this year...sounds like a blast!

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I loved the thrill rides I went on (ghost rider, sierra sidewinder, xcelerator, silver bullet) but if that isn't your thing then there's no point. If you're into them, walking onto (at least when I went, times will logically change as the month progresses on) some excellent coasters at night was the high point of the evening.

I love thrill rides but vertigo kicked in few years ago and is triggered by the big rides It feels like I am on Fantasyland Teacups up to a half hour AFTER ending a thrill ride. No longer fun...boo!

Great reviews....adds to the anticipation for HHN this Friday night! Yes!

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Some random notes from my second visit.

1. Excellent scare added to the formerly empty and WTF WHY? area of El Cucuy. Very simple but very effective.

2. The Red Faced Demon seems to be resetting in his little lair now. I think that's better. He goes from not being seen, so slowly creeping in, to BAM right there.

3. The mannequins used in the seance scene make the first Red Faced Demon's job hard. He has to sell terror while a table full of people don't react to him. Amazing energy though.

4. I saw a guy literally jump a barricade and sprint away from a walker on terror tram. Whoever did that scare, bravo. That guy was terrified.

5. The tram guide said that walkers were armed with chainsaws at the beginning of the terror tram. Come on man. Get the story right.

6. They seemed to get the fog thing figured out in Insidious.

7. My friend was so freaked out by the new "two sides of the room grabbing" scare in Insidious that she just crawled under.

8. The chainsaw guards at the end of the tram have a good layout. They really make you run from one guard to another.

9. Is the radio report in El Cucuy about the sudden increase of missing children new? I don't remember it but I really, really liked that detail. Very dark.

10. I think one of the problems with Black Sabbath is that since the venue is so huge, there are rooms that are big but don't benefit from their size.

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Oh yeah, that was also the first night that I saw Jurassic Park in the Dark. I really liked seeing the outside scenes at night, and the colored lights with the springs looked beautiful.

But I hate Guns N Roses. The original music is creepier.

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