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About Horrorisprettyrad

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  1. I actually had the hardest time with saw. It was the first maze of the night (or day, I guess), and for the life of me I couldn't tell what direction was the right one. Wasn't scared, more so frustrated that I kept on smashing into walls and almost walking into actors because of non existent lighting. I think universal needs to let people in maybe a half hour before opening for early entry, that could solve wait times exceeding 2 hours before the park opens. 5:00 early entry is just ridiculous. Also, stressing out over a plan to just getting to see everything shouldn't even be a worry, universal knows their crowds and should cut back on selling tickets (which I know they never will, because of all that sweet green molasses).
  2. Unpopular opinion, but I really wish that early entry wouldn't be so, well, early. At 5:00 on most nights, the sun hasn't even set yet. Sometimes they'll even let you in earlier! Leaking sunlight can straight up ruin a maze, and this year, getting your eyes adjusted to black hallway city was a complete nightmare.
  3. Well, I certainly hope that the budget isn't slashed again for one thing. Hope there's more decorations, in fact a complete Halloween layover of the park would be awesome. I feel like we're most definitely getting blumhouse Halloween (gross), and I wouldn't mind having another shot at Evil Dead either.
  4. I would like to see some more (and classier) atmosphere, and better quality in the mazes. Please let the dubstep go and use a moodier soundtrack. Put some legitimate decorations EVERYWHERE in the park (it shouldn't matter that they worry about night-show interfering with day-show, the decor doesn't have to be gory or TOO scary, just something that "fits"). Make the park actually feel like a special Halloween celebration, not just Universal Studios. I know that it's totally the unpopular opinion, but I'd let the go-go dancers go as well. I always thought they were really sleazy, and pander to the worst audience. Stop using uninspired, stale IPs and scares and use something that's out of the box. Why not use some creative effects that haven't been seen at HHNH before? Maybe even something "revolutionary". The whole "trigger boo-hole" is totally tired and shouldn't be every scare in a maze. The Purge, Freddy, Jason, Leatherface, and Michael Meyers are all something that I never want to lay my eyes upon again (though I'm aware they're never gonna let them go, just some wishful thinking here). Throw something in there that's popular, but also brings enough creativity to the table to work off of. My number one wish however is talent all around the park, not just designated scare zones. Why not some Treehouse of Horror in Simpsons? Or mutant dinosaurs in the lower lot? Roaming hoards even? Make it so there's NO safe zones. Hopefully this EVENTUALLY happens with HHN, but who knows. As long as people give them lots of money, they probably don't care and won't change a thing.
  5. Not sure if it was always a thing, but good lord is Horror Nights terrible with atmosphere. Wish they had more decor around the park (and I don't mean more scare zones, just some more festivity in general).
  6. Ash vs. Evil Dead starts off promising with a nice facade and a great soundtrack, totally setting a fun, chaotic tone. That's all the positives I will say for it though, because Ash vs. Evil Dead is just awful. Plain and simple. The environments would be fine (if not a little too wide in some scenes), but are completely ruined by the absolutely terrible transitions. Due to half of the maze composing of VERY long black hallways, everything felt like a disjointed mess. Story wise, I was lost; the transitions are so bad, that scenes feel like they come at a random, incoherent order. Let's talk about the characters and how they look like feces. The Ash masks are far from acceptable, why they wouldn't just give an actor a wig is beyond me (it would probably be less expensive as well). Other characters, like Pablo and Ruby's children, are barely visible or notable since there's not any scene that really highlights them. The scares aren't that great either, just the standard black hallway boo-hole and trigger tactics. The finale includes a good looking Henrietta puppet, but the room feels too empty and Henrietta is spaced too far from guests to really be scary. I know it looks like I've been shitting on it enough, but the biggest problem that Ash vs. Evil Dead has is its tone. The TV show that the maze is based on is a horror/comedy, so naturally, the maze should be as well. However, the entire maze is played straight and completely neutered compared to the show. No foul language, gore, or badass one liners here; just awkwardly censored dialogue and a handful of the least interesting scenes. Where's Ashy Slashy? Eligos? Ruby? The possessed Delta? There's so much to work with, so much potential! Make the maze way funnier and light hearted, with more scenes including characters that stand out more, and we could have a real winner here. Ash vs. Evil Dead could've been fantastic; however, a turn in the wrong creative direction resulted in a totally not groovy experience that's worth skipping. (See what I did there, with the reference? Pretty awesome-sauce joke if I do say so myself!)
  7. American Horror Story: Roanoke was one of the better mazes this year. The facade certainly doesn't give a good first impression however, as it's absolutely poopy butt. It doesn't set the mood whatsoever, and doesn't provide an immersive experience walking into it. Really, I'm not sure why the facade just wasn't the house; or if they were adamant on starting it in the woods, an "open forest" type of entrance, a trail surrounded with tall, intimidating trees, which then leads into the tent (in which the tent entrance is covered with twisting branches or something). The sound was a little weak in this one, as it didn't really help tell the story or explain what the hell was going on in some scenes; with the exception of the nurse room, which was the highlight of the maze. Some good, surprising hiding places and the narration from Professor only-interesting-character-but-dies-almost-immediately-after-he's-introduced is great. Another nice touch are the really gross looking Pigmen; those masks look REAL. The Chen scene is also pretty effective, their twisted bodies jumping out looked impressive. Sets and environments are also very nice, when they aren't black hallways. However, they're a tad forgettable, but I guess that's more so a problem with the IP itself (Roanoke just didn't have a lot of interesting environments). The maze also doesn't really tell a coherent story, which means that guests who haven't seen this season of American Horror Story will be completely lost on everything. Scares were fine, the standard HHN trigger affair; in which I'll add, something that really needs to change in Hollywood, as it's used much too often and you can actually get used to it by the end of the maze, making it not very scary at all. Some more overwhelming smells in here, just as obnoxious and distracting as ever. The finale was kinda lame, just a large black room with these cartoonish out of place wicker men. One of them is actually an actor, and will shuffle towards you as if they're in agonizing pain in order to "scare" you. So I feel really bad for that guy. I feel like what this maze needs is a better narrative and more scenes acted out by characters. Some more people in distress would be nice, like a room based on the scene where Cricket accidentally contacts the Butcher, and the windows "shatter" (just sound effects and maybe some air cannons), and the room is disoriented by a strobe light. The finale should be a TV crew attacked by all of the big bads of the season, with their trailer lit up in flames, or a huge bonfire of burning bodies. This sort of ending could reflect the meta nature of the show, and would leave the maze on an appropriate note. Scenes could be narrated by the husband and wife; you'd hear their voices detailing how unsafe they felt in the house, and the terrifying recollections of events. Audio of this is taken from that bad TV show "My Roanoke Nightmare", not to be confused with that even worse show, "American Horror Story". So overall, American Horror Story: Roanoke suffers from a terrible facade and ending, and doesn't really deliver a cohesive experience; but its nice looking sets, environments, and characters keep it afloat.
  8. Boy oh boy HHN is here! Mazes! Scare Zones! Crowds! Terror Tram! Crowds! Joobadabbies! Gang violence! And the newest attraction this year: black hallways full of nothing! Halloween magic is in the air ladies and gentlemen! This tedious review will be split up into parts that will be updated on this page, so tune in every now and then for more terrible maze reviews!!!! Now before I get into the mazes individually, a rant; what in the holy mother of god were with the rampant black walls and hallways this year? Look I know, black hallways were always a thing in HHN Hollywood, as they are usually used as (very rough) transitions between scenes, but they were also used somewhat sparingly. They are the ultimate crutch in mazes, and should be used only as a last resort. But Jesus Chriminy the budget must of been stretched paper thin or something this year. Nearly every transition in every maze was black hallways with absolutely no theming whatsoever, which is just ridiculous. For god sakes, there's a maze that is almost half composed of just black halls (and I'll get to that). Poor transitions can make the experience feel broken and mismatched, like patchwork; smooth transitioning is a must, as it helps tell a story and provide an engaging atmosphere. Anything could've helped these hallways, even some little props, or at least a coat of paint that goes with the environment. It's a bummer when you get stuck in a maze due to a backup problem (which happens VERY often at HHN), but it's an even bigger bummer when you're sitting in a boring ass black hallway for a good minute. Along with these black hallways is another setback this year; predictable boo-hole scares. About every single black hallway this year was accompanied by these, and it got old. Fast. To the point of complete predictability. I felt like a god damn psychic going through these mazes. So, black hallways + recycled boo-holes = not very spooky. Very very disappointed that was the case this year, as I expect more from Halloween Horror Nights. Especially if you're paying over 150$ for a front of the line pass (which is a must if want to experience ABSOLUTELY everything, including hitting the mazes twice). And if it is a matter of a budget strained too thin, I'd say that I'd rather have 4-5 great mazes than 7 "okay" ones. Alright, enough of my bitch fit, on with the mazes. Saw: The Games of Jigsaw was meh; just basically a museum of traps throughout the movie series. The facade was the meat packing plant from part 4 or whatever. It looked good, just nothing all that amazing, It set the mood and did its job. Sound design, as with most HHNH mazes, was great; Jigsaw's narration throughout his traps were effectively chilling. All of the traps looked fine and the actors are all excellent (as a matter of fact, the actors in every attraction at HHN this year are great, so a kiss on the forhead to them all). The first scare was actually really neat, with the trap serving as nice distraction scare, but repetition soon reared its ugly head. Throw in some black hallways with no thought put into them, and it really feels like the one Bill Murray movie involving a rat or something. Black hallway, trap, Piggo; rinse repeat. It got stale, thus boring, thus not very scary. There's also a room themed to the bathroom scene from the first movie, with this absolutely putrid piss smell that was so overpowering that it completely threw me out of the experience. It would of been fine had the scent been used less, with just a slight piss odor, but using it as much as it did was just distracting. Now what saves the maze is the ending. The last couple rooms, themed to the bucket-head trap from the Jigsaw trailer, were great. With tight hallways and corners full of saw blades thrusting out at you, it was as scary as the franchises Rotten Tomatoes ratings! I feel like more moments like this would make the maze much better; actually walking into the traps. Why not have a massive pendulum swinging out of the darkness, right above guests heads? Or a toxic gas room, like from the second movie, and the Pigs can seemingly pop out of nowhere from the thick fog. Saw: The Games of Jigsaw looked nice (excluding the black hallways), and had a cool finale, but those couldn't save it from becoming a repetitive mess.
  9. Wooow and the general public who aren't aware of the "special" early entry get to wait in 2 hour lines immediately when the park opens at 7:00. Good lord that's just awful.
  10. I get you dude. The first one was okay, the first half of it was strong but whenever it introduces the ghost hunters is when everything falls apart. The second one is atrocious. Literally everything fails in it. The third one is boring as shit and forgettable. I completely agree with trying them again though, maybe you'll like them more on the second round (I've seen them all a couple times and still dislike them)
  11. Oh yeah i'm also totally excited about going this year, in fact i really don't care if most of the other attractions are recycled. What bothers me about insidious is that the characters and settings are completely uninteresting (except the further, though that was never successfully pulled off at horror nights), and I'm anticipating the maze to be a carbon copy of 2015 with a new room or two for chapter 4 (a movie that nobody knows anything about) Long story short insidious is kinda boring
  12. I'm so excited for a maze based on a recycled horror franchise nobody cares about right now.
  13. let us agree to disagree. but if there is something that we can agree on, is that the scare zones don't sound very interesting at all this year. I hope Trick or treat turns out okay, but those house-box things aren't looking to great
  14. wouldn't you argue that bringing in more ips is a good move for universal? Ips certainly draw a bigger crowd than original concepts nowadays. I feel like the general public would care more for michael meyers than jack the clown (also not arguing that they should go full on ip like universal hollywood, its just having a creative side and an ip based side seems fair to me)
  15. finally some sort of lead! I really hope that means JP is the blumhouse mashup
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